Entry 59, Choices

 I honestly think I am not a very good guy when it comes to girls. Whenever I think about what I did, I just feel like a total butthole. I would do whatever it takes, for the girl I like to like me back. I basically betrayed one of my good friends and basically went against him and took the girl he liked. Well What  can I say? I loved her? I know thats not an excuse, but I truly did. Well I think this quote is true, I agree that choices, the ones we choose to make, rather than what we are capable of doing, is who we really are. It is what we choose to eat each day, that makes us who we are, not the things you are able to buy or able to eat, but the things we choose to eat ourselves. This quote is very well said, I have never considered anything from this kind of angle. I believe that this is a very legit statement and that it can be applied to everything. It is like getting into college, I could be capable of getting into Harvard, but that does not make me who I am. It does not make me a harvard student, It is the choices we make, that will make the difference, and that will count. I believe that it is a good quote, and that through my own experience, I had learned that, these are my choices, and the choices are who I am, not what I am ever capable of doing.

Entry 58, Free Write

 Well this is the first free write I have ever gotten from this English class. I always heard about the juniors getting free writes and study hall periods, well today, I finally got it! I feel as if our teacher gets more impatient with the junior class than us, maybe our class is just far more superior and far more responsible when it comes to school work. I am just kidding, you know that. Well today was very boring, I fell asleep at 8 and basically slept my way throughout the night and now it is almost 3 am and I am still here writing my journal. Sometimes I wanna ask myself, what are you doing with your life, spending every day, every hour and every minute slacking off. Well I don't want to face the responsibility of taking the SAT, or minding about my grades. That is why I have a C in algebra right now. I mean I still try, I have no Bs and everything are all As other than algebra. I don't know, sometimes I don't want to think about the future and just try to live under this moment and not having to care about anything else, but right now. Well tomorrow will be a good day I hope, with short periods and basically a completely free afternoon. What more could I ask for? Wow free writes are harder than I thought, I thought I would be good at it considering I kept a journal for English all of last year. Well night.

Entry 57, Sea Fever

 I believe that I have a fever for sweets. I am what you guys would normally call a "sweettooth", I especially love to eat candy bars, to deserts after meals. I can never get sick of eating candies, I can just eat them more and more, day after day. I can understand the author in loving the Ocean so much, loving the sea, loving the sea breeze filling his pores like a whetted knife. I understand all this, but I just don't feel the same way about the ocean after this poem. I believe that this author did a tremendous job in constructing that vivid image in every reader's minds about the sea and his love and affection for the sea, but I just don't understand why would a man spend so much time and effort on the ocean? Maybe it is just me, or I have never been actually sailing, into the deep pacific ocean, living the vagrant gypsy life. The waking up to the sea breeze part seemed very appealing for me, as that seemed like a relaxing, easy life, waking up everyday, doing nothing but finding your way out of this giant maze. I believe that this poem was great, it was fantastically written by a brilliant author that captured my mind, but at the end of the poem, I still don't understand why he loves it so much. Maybe others cannot understand my love for sweets as well.

Entry 56, Public Speaking

 Public speaking is something I use to be very afraid of, and certainly still am under certain circumstances. I believe that public speaking skills is something developed along the way, you must learn how to over come the fear of speaking infront of so many people. This is a big reason why I chose to join MUN, I realized that I will eventually have to get up infront of many people to talk about work, or my ideas that I hope would help contribute to my future career, so I thought to myself, why not? It is actually getting more fun during MUN, as we actively participate in debates about world issues and perform constructive debates among each other in attempt to solve the issues at hand. I believe that everyone needs to be able to hop over that barrier, for me it was more like a "I don't give a crap" attitude that made me a better public speaker I am today than before. It is to a point where, you have to tell yourself, you will never see these people in your life ever again, then you will feel alot better about looking stupid infront of others. I believe that it is just the pressure that few hundred eyes are staring at you, having opinions about you that makes public speaking so scary. I still get nervous alot of times, and it is up to me, to train myself, and shape myself into someone who is confident about everything I say on stage.

Entry 55, Inspiration of Sounds

  I am a huge fan of electronic music. As a part of this new generation, I am just like everyone else, into the loud booming bass in my ears as I waltz down the street. Many people might find this annoying and hard to listen to, but as being a part of this generation, I can let you know that it is more than relaxing to listen to. Alot of times, I seek an escape way, to find other places to hide my emotions, where do I run? Into the world of music. This would be a type of inspiring as well as great sounds of the day, there is also the bad sounds of the day such as the yelling of our head of school, the horrendous school bell coming on every single class, it is just absolutely ridiculous. Now lets not talk about the bad sounds but rather the more ear pleasing pleasures of our day, music. Many songs can trace back to a period of time in my life, when I listen to a song alot, when I get a new song I really like, I tend to keep listening to it and eventually the hype dies out for me. But then after coming back after a long time and listening to the sounds that I use to love, it all added up, everything came rushing back into my mind, the vivid images of my ex girlfriends, the warm feeling when I knew that I could wake up tomorrow not being afraid, not being limited, the sounds are just a memory, as I am living in the present, and such images are gone. Forever.  

Entry 54, Travel

  Many people have bad experiences with transportation, as many had lost family from it, or almost lost themselves throughout the process. It is the most terrifying thing traveling in air, and realizing that your aircraft is currently plunging into the clouds. It is the most frightening thing, traveling home at night, seeing lights of a vehicle coming your way with no intention of stopping. It is the most heart-shaking thing, to see your boat, the one you currently travel on, is being devoured by mother nature. It is our minds, as a human being, to have doubts, to be scared at these ways of transporting. It is simply not ones fault, if they develop a bad image in their mind, as possibly they had lost someone to that sort of transportation, or they had went through a significant event involving that type of transportation. I had many types of fears regarding to transportation, as I have been in car crashes, and other types of events that triggered the fear I currently have today. I had been involved with a car crash over the summer, as my friend was driving, while staring at the beetlenut girls, who ran into another vehicle infront of us. more than one hundred thousand dollars of damage, that event shook me. Everytime I sense the car not stopping, my heart skips a beat.

Entry 53, Write a Sonnet

Plantation Ruined 

Shouldn’t people love mother nature?

As it has provided us with our homes,

Why should nature have to meet departure?

We need to seek answers like Sherlock Holmes

There are plants and animals disrupted

As we have no right to turn to the killers

Waiting for nature to soon be erupted.

We need to stay strong and act like pillars

To spread awareness among the people

And show love for our poor mother nature

Protecting things from apple to maples

Setting up laws in our legislature

Individuals take nature for granted

As we all do, With minds that are slanted 

Entry 50, Tanka Poems

Brown and Yellow Plants

Strong wind blows by like daggers

Piles of racked up leaves

Scarfs being wrapped and shorts gets chaged

Children jumping into leaves

Excitement within

Barks of love as well as welcome

Licks you on your face

Greets you with its tiny paws

A genuine man’s best friend

Transparent Ocean

Calm waves slowly meets sea shore

Reflection of sky

Beige sand dominates ocean floor

Aquatic creatures form cities

Entry 49, Cinquain Poems

Tree

Boring, Steady

Blooming, swaying, shading

Dominating, lack emotions,

Plant life

Nails

Dirty, pointy,

Scratching, protecting, blocks

Unnecessary to paint colors

Girl’s Nails

Chairs

Embrace, Comfort

Structuring, providing,

People sit on when they are tired

Supporting

Entry 52, Respond to Shakespeare

Dear Shakespeare:
  I cannot express the love I have for you as well. I am deeply flattered as butterflies conquer my stomach, hearts swarmed my mind with nothing else but your name in it. I cannot express my emotions at this time, for such a staggering poem. I feel as if I cannot match up to you, I feel as if we were in separate classes of people, we are people from two different places. I know I am more beautiful and better in everyway than summer, but it is just wrong, we are just not the same people, people would not accept our love right now. People would look upon us as if we were freaks, we would then be isolated in this world. William, your charming charisma is absolutely unavoidable, the way you look at me in the eyes, the way you treat me, the way you tell me "you look beautiful tonight", you melt my heart completely, as you have all of my heart, all of my soul. You know I belong to you, but this is simply wrong. We cannot continue like this William! I know this letter is short, this letter may be dreadful for your passion for me, but we cannot be together. No one would ever accept us and understand how we feel about each other. This is simply wrong. Sorry

Entry 51, Heart!

 She used alot of rhyming in her poem. This poem is talking about the act of losing love and how moving on would be better and right now she has to forget that person. I believe that she used this device to again emphasize her heartbroken, hollow body as she is feels dismay towards her lost heart, her love. I believe that it is utterly difficult to separate your feelings and thoughts all together. I believe that the way you are feeling, would be a type of thought. I believe that under circumstances in which you wouldn't care about your own feelings or feelings for others is when you separate your thoughts and feelings. Things you do without considering the consequences, taking drugs, driving home tipsy, these are all things I believe that you would separate your feelings and thoughts. I personally have not yet experienced such feeling as I honestly don't understand how it should feel to separate your thoughts and feelings. I believe that these two are closely related and that it would not be right or okay to separate them. It is also impossible in my opinion. I believe that it is like between chimpanzees and monkeys, they are so closely tied together that I believe that you cannot just separate them. These are feelings that are stuck together, and they need to be stuck together in order for our body to function.